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Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Moving Forward and Looking Back

The week between Christmas and New Year’s is a good time to reflect and look back on what has happened over the past year.  It is also a good time to look forward to what is ahead.  In January last year, I accepted a new job with a different company that in the beginning made me question my decision to take it.  It turns out that it was one of the best decisions I could have made for Angel and I.  The company I was working for was dissolved in September, leaving all of the employees unemployed.  I don’t think I could have gone through being unemployed again.  I am excelling at my current job making this past quarter the best one of the year.  I have great partners, a cool boss, and I am hoping to be considered for Rookie of the Year. 
2011 was a difficult time for me and my family emotionally.  However, in our down times we found strength in each other.  I have come to realize that we may not understand the things people do, but there is a reason and a consequence for everyone’s actions.  A certain affair left my family and me questioning God, our faith, and asking why.  A situation that could have driven us all apart brought us closer together.  Although, we may not know the reason why this happened now, I am sure in time it will reveal itself.  There is no doubt that God has a reason for it, just like everything else.
A custody agreement was reached between Angel’s father and me this past year.  At first I didn’t like it.  I don’t ever want to be away from her, but I have come to accept our arrangement.  I am glad her father loves her and wants to be with her as much as I do.  I will admit I miss her terribly when she is gone, but some down time is usually welcomed. 
I have made some incredible new friends this past year and rekindled some old friendships.  I treasure my friends.  They have seen me through so much, and I continue to make memories with both old and new.  
Going into a new year I always make my list of goals and resolutions.  I don’t like to make finite goals like lose 5 pounds by the end of the week; rather my goals are something like to be healthier.  This year I am trying to cut out dairy and sweets from my diet, not completely (I could never give up ice cream), but limit it.  I also have a goal of traveling abroad.  2012 will be 3 years since I have done any serious travel.  I am looking forward to seeing more of the world.  I plan on focusing more on my workouts and doing more yoga!  I also want to try to not be so cynical and stay positive.  There was something that I planned on making a resolution which came early in the form of a text message.  A few days before Christmas I received this message read it once then re-read it.  In a moment, the last thread of hope I had dissipated and a weight was lifted from my shoulders.  I have peace now.  When emotion is completely gone all you are left with is reality, and reality is much easier to deal with than emotion.  So I will move into 2012 at peace, which is something I haven’t had in a really long time. 
2012 will be a great year.  Every year that I have Angel is a great year!  This year I am hoping for love to find me and to just take things one day at a time.  Life isn’t perfect.  If it was it, it would be boring.  I’ve learned to hold on tight and enjoy the ride.  Remember, you have to go through some valley’s to appreciate the mountain top!

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