Before Angel was born I didn’t really think about sleep too much. I went to bed when I was sleepy and woke up when I was fully rested. Since her birth sleep has become something I obsess over. In the beginning, when they are first born, you wake up every 2 to 3 hours to nurse and eventually become so sleep deprived that you begin to hallucinate (See my blog Sleep Deprivation ). I had hoped that as she got older that she would grow out of this not sleeping through the night phase, but alas she hasn’t. I know, I know she is almost 3 and should have been sleeping through the night in her own bed about 2 years ago and to all you people that brag and say my baby slept through the night after 6 weeks I say SHUT IT!!!!! I can’t imagine. Now instead of my pre-Angel uninterrupted 8 hours of glorious rest, I get about 2 hours (sometimes less) before I am rudely awaken by screams through the monitor. The funny thing is, now it is not crying though the monitor, it is hostile demands. “Mommy you come in here and get me right now!” Well, who am I to argue with that????? Yes, I understand that I am an enabler to this situation, but it breaks my heart to hear her cry and when she doesn't sleep with me I end up waking up anyway wondering if she is okay. It also doesn't help the fact that her Dad allows her to sleep with him when she is at his house. So even if I get her to sleep in her bed at home when she comes back from his house I have to start all over again.
It wouldn’t be so bad if once she got into my bed she slept like a normal person but she sleeps like a wild animal. I have been kicked in the back, slapped in the face, and head butted in the nose……. not fun things to wake up to in the middle of the night. I have a king size bed which one would think would be big enough for a 5’2 adult and a munchkin but apparently it’s not. I end up basically hanging off the side of the bed mostly trying not to get kicked. She also can carry on full conversations with someone about something I don’t really understand but it still wakes me up. I know there are some people that enjoy family beds (a bed where everyone sleeps together) and to them I say good for you, apparently you don’t need beauty rest as badly as I do. It is this reason why the Friday nights when Angel leaves to go to her Dad’s I have a date with Benadryl or some red wine. I would rather sleep than anything else. I am really hoping this desire for sleep is not a sign of old age merely a sign of parenthood.
I recently got rid of the baby monitor, because there is something about those red lights blazing at midnight that forces me to get up, go get Angel and allow her to sleep with me. I have done very well so far this week encouraging her to sleep in her own bed. Last night was an exception, there was a bad thunderstorm she does not like loud noises so when I was awaken from the thunder I knew she had been as well. The really awesome part of all of this is when she does sleep with me she wants to hold my hand. So as tired as I am when her little hand curls around my thumb I still smile and am thankful she is right there beside me. Then I get kicked in the head or she thrashes around and I look forward to my date with a good night sleep and maybe just maybe Prince Charming will wake me with a kiss. Then again maybe I will wake myself up, turn over and go back to sleep.