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Sunday, June 23, 2013

Objects

It is amazing how an object can hold so much.  While cleaning out my bathroom closet this morning I came across an old jewelry case sitting on the floor covered in dust.  It has been years since I have looked at its content, so being in the purging mood that I was in, I decided to go through it and get rid of contents that I won’t ever ware.  In it I found an emerald ring set in a fat gold band, a broken tiny watch from the 1940’s, silver initial jewelry, 2 silver band bracelets with my initials on them, a bevel stop pearl necklace and the last box I opened contained a thin silver man’s ring with a name engraved on the inside.  It is amazing that an object so small, so insignificant, so forgotten can bring up so many memories.  I sat on the floor with that ring in my hand, my stomach turned and for a moment I felt sick like I used to feel after I found out what the ring symbolized.  I turned it over in my fingers feeling its light weightiness and even put it on my own finger, a small part of me wishing it was actually for me, but then thanking God that it wasn’t.  I looked around at the other objects some of them made me smile when I thought about what they represented and the memories attached to them. 
The emerald ring was a gift from my high school boyfriend.  I think he gave it to me for Christmas my senior year in high school.  It is a cheap ring and I would never wear it now, but he knew that emeralds were my favorite and probably spent all he had to get it for me.  So I put it back in the box smiling at the thought of him and all the memories we shared. The broken tiny watch belonged to my grandmother who died when I was 16.  I don’t know how I came to be the holder of this watch but I hold on to it as a small piece of her.  I tried to get it fixed once and the jeweler said it wasn’t worth fixing, maybe not to him.  So I put it back in the bag it came out of.  The mismatched silver initial jewelry was a hot trend in the mid 90’s when I was in high school.  All the girls at school would wear this somewhat gaudy jewelry.  It was like we were branding ourselves by putting our initials on it.  The bracelets matched the other jewelry and the reason I have 2 identical bracelets is because they were graduation gifts.  One of them, not sure which one, was a gift from one of my very best friends at the time.  We were inseparable and had matching bracelets like the wonder twins.  I haven’t spoken to her in almost 15 years.  The bevel stop pearl necklace I wore on my wedding day.  Yes, I suckered someone into marrying me.  I think about that day and how happy I was.  It was the perfect day complete with a horse drawn carriage.  Many mistakes were made, mostly out of immaturity and selfishness and the marriage did not last.  I think about all of the what if’s and put the necklace back in its velvet case.  Finally back to the ring what to do with it?  Should I give it back to its original owner?  It was given to me as a promise a symbol to build trust.  So I put it back in the box, in the jewelry case and will put it back in the bottom of the closet and forget about it for another few years just like I will do with the memories.  

It has been 10 days since Angel has been gone I have heard her twice for a total of less than 5 minutes.  I guess I am just sappy and sad today.  Tomorrow is a new day with new memories to be made.   

Sunday, June 16, 2013

Brad Paisley! Kicking off the Summer Right!

I hope this weekend was an indication of how my summer is going to be without Angel.  She left Friday afternoon, and although I was extremely sad I am trying to look on the bright side.  I spent Friday night low key, just dinner and a movie.  Saturday morning I had my usual coffee but no biscotti in bed, that is my and Angel’s routine.  I picked up her princess dresses, put books and puzzles away, put the last of her clothes in the drawers and turned off her nightlight.  Shockingly enough I was okay.  Later I headed down to the beach to get ready for Brad Paisley in concert.  I am not what you call a huge fan of Brad Paisley, but I thought it would be fun. Little did I know I would be sitting in the FRONT ROW! This was not the pit where people stand sardine style this was actual seats almost directly center stage.  I will admit I had to delete many pictures and videos of Angel off my phone to make room for all the pictures and videos I took of Brad and his opening act, Chris Young.  The show was AMAZING.  That man can ROCK a guitar!  It’s crazy how you can hear a song on the radio and think that is a good song, but then when you see the artist perform it you realize it is a great song!
I don’t know how many guitars Brad played but there were so many.  Brad stood in front of me numerous times and rocked out.  At one point when he was in front of me jamming he looked down and said “Hey Baby”!  I kid you not.  He just got a new fan out of that.  It was right here when he said it!!!!!!!!-------->
A hologram of Carrie Underwood even made an appearance and was so real! I have numerous videos and as soon as I figure out how to put videos on this blog I will post them, just don't mind my screaming.  :)









Today, I went to church, had a Pilates session and am staying for yoga after, because what else can I do but pray, breathe and BE?  The summer will be over before I know it!

Tuesday, June 11, 2013

FOLLOW UP

I bumped in to one of my readers a few days ago and she asked me how Angel was doing without her passy.  She mentioned that I haven’t written a follow up to any of Angel’s milestones like potty training, giving up her passy and sleeping in her big girl bed.  Well, here it goes…..

Angel is completely potty trained and is Miss Independent when it comes to this issue.  Sometimes she doesn’t even tell me she needs to go, she just goes and then comes back and yells, “I poo pooed in the potty mommy”!!!!  She even tells me the size; she says she does a mommy one and an Angel one.  That is always nice to hear especially when people are around.  Angel is very proud of herself and even told the cashier at Target that she is a big girl and poo poos in the potty.  Why shouldn’t she tell everybody that?  So things on the potty training end are going well, except for one small issue.  We were outside playing one day when Angel pulled her pants down and popped a squat and peed right in my Mother’s back yard.  I stood there with my mouth open holding in a laugh that was coming up from my toes.  I didn’t think much of it and decided not to make a big deal over it.           (I have found the more attention you bring to an issue the greater chance they are to do it again.)  My Mom told me that she did it again a few days later.  My Mom told Angel that if she needed to go to the bathroom when they were outside all she had to do was tell her and she would take her to the potty.  Last weekend we were home and I looked over and there she was again peeing in the back yard.  It was at this time that we had a little talk.  I asked her why she was tee teeing outside and she said because she was a dog.  I am not sure if all children pretend like they are a cat or a dog, but in my experience they do at some point.  Her dad has a dog at his house and I guess Angel has seen her use the bathroom outside.  Since she pretends to be a dog it is only logical in her mind that she do the same thing.  She hasn’t done it since then and other than some pee on her shoe what is the harm???

Giving up the passy was easier than I thought.  Of course there was the melt down when she basically wanted me to rob the Easter Bunny’s house (See "Its Birthday Time" Blog), and there were a few nights that she cried, begged and pleaded for me to go to the store and get her one but those nights passed.  The only slip up we almost had was when she was in the guest bedroom, picked up a pillow on the bed and underneath it was a passy.  I jumped up Matrix style and landed on top of it before she saw it.  She has been 3 months passy free!  I’m sure that’s an issue we won’t have again….. I hope.

For Angel’s 3rd birthday I bought her a full size big girl bed complete with Disney princess bedding.  I thought for sure with all this pink she would want to sleep in her big girl bed…… I was wrong!  It must have started right after she gave up her passy.  I felt so bad for her at night.  She was in a new bed surrounded by princess (I am sure those girls can look pretty 
scary in the middle of the night) and she didn’t have her passy, the one thing that offered her comfort. So I did what any pushover parent would do, I let her sleep with me.  I honestly thought this would only last for a few nights and once the passy withdrawals were over she would want to get in her bed.  HA! Not a chance.  Every night became a struggle.  I would go through our routine bath, brush teeth, read stories, rock in the rocking chair, put her in the bed and then prayers.  She would usually start crying when I stood up out of the rocking chair, sometimes she would wait until after we said her prayers.  Sometimes she would go down fine and after about an hour I would hear a noise.  I would get up and just like something out of a horror movie I would see a small figure standing in the hallway back-lit from the bathroom night light looking like a ghost.  That was nothing compared to the nights I would wake up startled and see 2 eyes staring at me right over the top of the bed.  Poor thing, I have no idea how long she stood beside my bed not wanting or afraid even to wake me up.  So of course I let her get in the bed with me.  This has to stop!  I desperately need beauty rest and I don’t sleep well when I get head butted, kicked or when my nose gets tickled by her hair. Yes she sleeps that close to me.  One of the very few benefits of Angel being gone is that I will get some sleep. 

3 more days and she is leaving.  I am sure we both will have a great summer.  I will miss her terribly and I am sure she will miss me too.  It will fly by and before we both know it she will be back home. 

Don’t worry I have stock piled things to write about, I just hope I can find the time.