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Monday, December 22, 2014

2014 What a Fantastic year!

The holidays are upon us which means it is the end of the year.  I thought I would take a few minutes to reflect on 2014. I have to admit that this has been one of the BEST years of my life!  I have had years where great things happen like the year my Angel was born, but that same year was filled with heartache and hurt.  This is the first year that I can remember where every aspect of my life has been good, not just good GREAT! I am recognizing this and thanking God for all my blessings. I think back to 5 years ago when I was broken hearted, unemployed, pregnant and alone and how different my life is now. So much, much better.

I guess I will start at the beginning of 2014 when I rang in the new year kissing the man I now call my fiancé (I know! More on that to come).  Valentine’s Day I was not as bitter as I have been in years past. Cynical yes bitter no.  I made it through another 27th birthday and celebrated it at home with my best present ever, my sweet Angel.  I got through a dance recital, soccer games Halloween (3 costume changes!), all things Frozen, and I am not talking about cold things, and those never ending kid birthday parties.  I did some of the most traveling I have ever done in one year going to 6 European countries including Prague, Amsterdam, Belgium and one of my new favorites, Paris.  Domestically I did some major traveling there too hitting some cities I have never been to like Chicago and Key West.  I threw Michael one of the biggest baddest surprise birthday parties.  I made a big career move and am in a new role that I absolutely love!  My friends and family are still around me, supporting me and best of all loving me.    

Now back to my fiancé, Thanksgiving day I got one of the most unexpected surprises of my life when this man that loves me for me, got on one knee and asked me the question I thought I would never hear and of course I said “YES”!  Michael is the knight in shining armor I have waited for.  He makes me so happy and has become my very best friend (2nd only to my one and only Mom).  The greatest thing is that he loves Angel like his own.  He has 2 boys that Angel absolutely adores.  We are all working on blending our family.  I am actually working on a book about blended families since I have to explain all of this to Angel.

I am looking forward to 2015. I have no doubt it will be just as good as 2014.  There will be more adventures; Angel will start kindergarten (KINDERGARTEN!!!!  When did this happen?), of course a wedding, a move, the blending of families and big announcement.  I will ring it in the same way I did 2014 and the way I will every year moving forward.  I am attaching pictures from this year.  Enjoy!
I hope each of you has a wonderful holiday!  Merry Christmas and Happy Happy New Year! 

Romans 5:3-5
Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.

To those of you who are new to my blog please know that names are changed to protect peoples privacy.  

Thursday, October 30, 2014


Like most people I have a variety of apps on my phone.  I have some games for my little Angel, one gives me stock quotes, some for email, weather, shopping and I even have one that will interpret my dreams.  A few months ago I downloaded an app called TimeHop.  For those of you who aren’t familiar with this app it gives you your own personal day in history. 
It can pull up old FaceBook post, pictures you took on a certain day and allow you to look back at what you were thinking and doing from previous years.  I really enjoy this app as it mostly shows me pictures of my little Angel and how she has grown in these 4 years.  However, sometimes I will get a picture of me and people that I used to call friends.  It pains me to look at these once happy faces and realize that our friendship is over and will never be again.  At the same time it allows me to reflect and be thankful that some people are out of my life and thankful for the people that are still in it.   A few days ago I got a TimeHop from 4 years ago and it brought me back to a very sad time in my life when my heart was broken.  I was so distraught, lonely and convinced that I would never pull myself out of the darkness that surrounded me.  Here I am 4 years later and I think about how different my life is.  My heart is mended, I am no longer lonely and I have seen the light, so to speak.  This has made me realize that that old cliché that I used to hate to hear is so true, “time heals all wounds”.  And it does.  There will always be scars from these difficult times, but they are just reminders for me.  I am now thankful that I have had to go through rough times in my life because it has made me appreciate where I am in my life and what all I have to look forward to.  If I can offer anyone that is going through tough times any advice it would be hold on it does get better because it does! 

Wednesday, October 8, 2014

Kids and Technology

There is a lot of talk these days about children being exposed to too much technology.  There have been ad campaigns showing babies coming out of the womb knowing how to work an iPhone.  I don’t think it is that bad, but I do know that most 1 year olds know how to unlock one.  It is hard not to allow them to play with your smart phone or iPad especially when you need 10 minutes to yourself or if you would really like to enjoy a conversation without being interrupted.  However, it is not a baby sitter, and I try to be a responsible parent, allowing Angel to play limited amount of time.  I have also found that it can be an incentive for good behavior. There are times though that she gets to play with it wayyyyy more than I would like and I have come up with a list of the top 5 ways to know when your toddler or pre Ker has taken over your smart phone.

1.       You go to your photo album and there are 64 pictures of a poptart, 37 pictures of feet, 8 pictures of something you can’t make out but you are praying it is not something the dog has left behind and 1 video of you trying to get the phone away from your child.

2.       You have more apps of children’s games than you do apps for yourself AND you have no more storage for your necessary apps, like an app for your credit card, banking or fitpal because your phone is filled with princess apps and pictures of feet!

3.       When you go to the gym and you open up Pandora expecting some hard core techno to get your work out on and The Wiggles start singing “Hot Potato Hot Potato”.  I have learned to make sure my head phones are in before I open it because it is extremely embarrassing for everyone to be trying to find who the idiot is that is playing The Wiggles at the gym!

4.       Random text messages like hnajufghdoiahygfdnbbbbbbbjjzzzzfheuwhte wahgtjfkerwhgt have been sent to your boss or posted on your or FaceBook page.

5.       Finally, you know your kid has been spending way too much time on your device when you ask them if they can figure out what is wrong with it! 

Saturday, July 12, 2014

Fat and Happy

I have heard the term fat and happy before and have even used it in a sentence; that baby is fat and happy, but I have never said this about myself.  A few days ago I tried on a pair of shorts that I wore last year and noticed they were a bit snug (I did not have to lie on the bed to zip them up or anything but they were a tad tight).  This prompted me to do something that I never do; I got on the scales and weighed myself.  GASP!!!!!  I have gained 6 pounds!!!!!!!  (6 lbs. may not sound like a lot to some but for a borderline Ooompa Loompa (this means I am short) 6 lbs. is a lot). I thought to myself, how could this happen??  I had lunch with a close friend the next day and she said it makes sense you are “fat and happy”.  Happy, yes I am, but when did fat start going along with that? She asked me what has changed in the past months.  Well, for starters I am not eating salad and cereal by myself for dinner at night, instead of going to the gym as often as I can I am making time for other things, and I am going out to dinner more.  This isn’t something that happened overnight. I am guessing it started a few months ago.  I thought about all of the delicious food I ate when I was in Europe in April, the cook outs for Memorial Day, July 4th, celebrating friend’s birthdays and all the food I eat with my sweet Michael.  My eating habits, especially since Angel is gone, consist of delicious bacon, egg and cheese (cheese that I got in Amsterdam so you know it is fatty) on a toasted English muffin for breakfast, incredible oven toasted chicken pesto sandwiches, chunky guacamole and chips for snacks and blackened salmon over penne pasta in an alfredo sauce for dinner.  Okay this is not every day, but I am not used to eating like this.  Bottom line my man can COOK y’all!  (He can also dance.)  At this point I guess it is true, I am fat and happy.  However, I am going to work on being, happy and fit. 

I have 4 more weeks until Angel gets home and I am going to start working on losing the 6 lbs. I have found.  I am revisiting an old love of mine, tennis and am playing as often as I can.  Michael and I are doing active things together and making healthy food choices.  Whether I am fat and happy I am just happy I am happy and am with someone that makes me so! 


Thursday, June 5, 2014

Summer Nights

Side walk chalk drawing, trampoline jumping, running through the sprinkler, tricycle riding, mosquito bite scratching, it must be the beginning of summer.  Last night, as I dabbed calamine lotion all over Angels legs covering each mosquito bite she stood back from me looking like she was wearing polka dotted pants, I had a flash back to my own childhood when I looked very similar.  I was covered in mosquito bites from summer evenings playing outside until the sun went down.  I am so happy that she does get to play outside and is not plopped in front of the television, although I despise those nasty blood suckers and have tried everything to get rid of them.  But, we live in the South where it has been raining a lot so they are to be expected. 
Angel had her K3 graduation last week and is officially out of school as are the rest of the kids.  When we get home from, work for me or Nana’s/dance class for Angel, we usually put our things down and head outside.  My house has become the neighborhood cool hang out house.  I am usually not even out of my car good before I have little kids running up asking if Angel can play.  I would like to complain about this, but at least Angel is at home allowing me to monitor what all is going on.  There are 7 neighborhood kids that usually end up at my house at some point during the day.  They are good kids and Angle LOVES having them to play with.  My boyfriend and I call these kids the mouth breathing nugget eaters (a term of endearment).  Yesterday, I had one of them come over 3 times asking if Angel could play and this past Sunday morning at 8:15, 3 of them were ringing my doorbell!  Really?!  I hadn’t even finished my first cup of coffee, but “yes ok y’all can come in, but you have to clean up when you are done.”  Which never happens.  I end up cleaning while Angel is taking a nap.  SUCKER! I am not sure who is going to miss Angel more me or her friends (this is, of course, a ridiculous question because I will miss her as always!)

Angel will be leaving for her Dad’s next week for the long grueling summer away.  This year I am not worried about myself as much as I am her.  Of course it is always hard on me and has been the past 3 years, but I have learned to cope.  Angel though is older and very close to her Mommy.  I am concerned that she is going to get home sick.  Of course I have asked (as I have every year) for some visitation and have not gotten an answer.  As in years past I have lots of activities arranged and plan on staying very busy by working out, visiting with friends, home improvements and spending time with the other love of my life, Michael (not his real name, see my post "Redeeming Love" and if you haven't read the book I strongly encourage it).  Happy Summer Vacation Everyone!

Sunday, May 11, 2014

Mother's Day 2014

It has been a while since a post but I couldn’t let one of the best holidays of the year pass and not write about it. I went back and read the first Mother’s Day blog, Check out "A Tribute to Mom", I wrote when Angel was about 6 weeks old. My journey as a mom had barely begun and already I had a deep appreciation for all my mother did for me. Back then I was overwhelmed with love, joy and happiness; the usual emotions that a woman has shortly after giving birth. Today, 4 years later I am still overwhelmed…………. Still with those emotions but also with new ones like patience, counting to 10, deep breaths and sometimes trying to remain calm and not laugh when dealing with a 4 year old (YES Angel is 4!!!!!). I see so much of myself in her and I wonder how my Mom did it? She is so sassy and strong willed and she displays characteristics that will be wonderful when she is 25, right now I want to wash her mouth out with soap! In these 4 years as a mother I have learned a lot from her. I love her honesty and innocence. She will always come clean when she doesn’t get smiley faces at school and say “I didn’t get smiley faces because I pulled Olivia’s hair”. At least she is honest. Angel, like most girls is obsessed with Frozen so of course she wants to be like the girls in the movie and asked me to braid her hair. I have never French braided before and even had to look at Pintrest for a how to. The second time I braided it she wanted to wear it to school. It looked awful but she walked in to school and told everyone to look at her beautiful braid that her mommy did for her. I was filled with so much delight that she was so happy with it and didn’t care (actually she probably didn’t know) that it looked as bad as it did. Just yesterday we were getting ready to go to the pool and she told me we had to put on her swim top to cover up her “dots”. I want to tell her stay like this forever.

This morning she woke me up with kisses and told me I was her best friend and that she loved me so much. Then asked if the sun was awake (what she really wanted to know was if I was awake). We started off this morning with our weekend ritual of biscotti and coffee in bed (the coffee is for me). As I write this she is cleaning her room aka stuffing everything in bins and under the bed. She has come in here a few times asking me questions, blowing a whistle and dressed up in her finest dress up clothes with all the accessories. I guess she wants to make sure I know she is still here. She is just a tad ostentatious. HMMMMMMM wonder where she gets that from?????? We are about to head to my Mom’s to celebrate with some of the other wonderful Mothers in my family.

Happy Mother’s Day to all the Moms out there. Our jobs are never done! But we love every second of it……… as long as it’s not before 6 in the morning ; )

Mother's Day 2011
Mother's Day 2012
Mother's Day 2013
Mother's Day 2013 the day after

Thursday, February 13, 2014

Valentine's YAY!!!!!!

Okay, maybe I was a little premature when I wrote that my last blog was my last blog. I just felt guilty like I wasn’t writing enough mostly because I don’t have a lot of time to spare. I won’t promise that I will write regularly but I will say that I will write when I am really really motivated, and I am really really motivated today. Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day and for the past 5 years or so this has been the dreaded holiday for me. (I am still not that big of a fan, as most of you know, thinking that this holiday has become a more commercialized guilt trip than Christmas.) This year I won’t say that I am excited about it, maybe a little, but I am certainly not dreading it as badly as in previous years. This year I will not be crying, angry, jealous or heading out to some cheesy bar for “single people to celebrate V-day together”. I won’t avoid FaceBook to see how wonderful all of my friend’s husbands and boyfriends are and what they sent to their offices. This year I won’t put Adele’s album "21" on repeat as well as songs like "Gravity" by Sara Bareilles and Dave Matthews "If Only" and sit in a corner rocking back and forth while chewing on my hair (okay it was never that bad), but you get the picture. It has been difficult like it is for most people who want to be in love. This year I will smile, pass out kisses (the chocolate kind!), make homemade Valentines cards (already done) and I won’t get upset when I walk through the sea of balloon ribbons at the Dollar Tree getting Angel a balloon (they are only $1 in case you didn’t know). My new repeat songs are "Adore You" by Miley Cyrus and "Just Say Yes" by Snow Patrol (my new song repeater). Prince Charming may not have rescued me from the highest room in tallest tower and rode off into the sunset with me on his noble stead (Yes I have been watching Shrek WAAAAYYYY too much), but I do have someone that will tell me the 3 words we all want to hear especially on Valentine’s Day and I will be able to say them right back. HAPPY VALENTINES DAY EVERYONE!!!!

Sunday, February 2, 2014

Last Blog

Dear Readers.....if I have any left,

This will be my last blog post (unless some unforeseen event takes place leaving me tons of time on my hands).  I had hoped that I could end my final blog with a love story about a knight in shinning armor that has rescued me, married me and we ride off into the sunset with our family and our happily ever after.  Or perhaps I would have at least finally married my Michael (see blog post "Redeeming Love" (I think I need to read that book again)) and well it would have ended the same as the previous scenario.  A few years ago I thought I would once again be able to write about "expecting" and this time it wouldn't be as unexpected. Thus far in my life these events have not happened.  I am still a single working mother who is trying to navigate through life's sticky situations.  I cannot believe it has been 4 years since I started this blog.  It started out as a means of therapy for me and I will admit I wrote some VERY emotional blogs.  I had hoped that I would get a million followers and would get endorsed by Babies R Us or at least be offered a book deal, but no deal.  I spend my days like most parents, single or married, working or stay at home, busy.
I have started writing many blogs and never get the chance to finish them or I have just been uninspired.  Since starting UnexpectingMommy I have been able to share my story and receive others stories in return.  I have been able to relate to people on levels I wouldn't have before.  I am thankful for this outlet.
You never know I may have a sudden inspiration to write something prophetic, but in the event that I never write again please know that I words cannot express how thankful for my little Angel.  She came into my life and changed it for the better.  I am a better person because of her and am thankful God intrusted her to me while we are on this earth.  Like most parents my child is my world. 
Now while everyone else is gathering around the television to watch the Super Bowl, Angel and I are making Valentines, after we clean up the princess Play Doh.
God Bless each of you!  Thank you for sharing in my little story.